The Breath of Life

"the LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being." Genesis 2:7

I have given birth to four children- 3 naturally (ouch) and 1 by emergency c-section. I remember with all four of them the anticipation as they entered the world waiting for their first cry. It felt like minutes while the whole room stood still waiting....waiting...for that first cry. Then you hear it and everyone relaxes, rejoices, while they hand your baby to you to hold for the first time. I will never forget hearing that first cry and holding them for the first time. They were so warm and cuddly. You know what makes that first cry possible? Their first breath of life. I never thought about that. I was always waiting to hear that first cry not their first breath. Before they make that first cry, they take a deep breath and out it comes. I never thought of that until Monday night January 5Th.

Nicholas had been having a rough day. He was teething again which makes for a rough time. It takes so long for his teeth to come in and due to his brain injury he is very sensitive to pain. So all day he had rapid breathing due to the pain and was just uncomfortable. I needed (well, I say needed but in reality I did not need to) to go work/church to do a few things. Stephen was working so I had to take all of the kids. This is not as bad as it sounds. I go at night when no one is there and they can play in our office area. My office has a big meeting room so they always play in there. So against my better judgment I loaded the kids up and headed to church.

Nicholas is not too fond of being strapped into things...car seat..kids cart, etc. He will do okay sometimes but if he is mad he will NOT sit in his seats. Well tonight was one of those nights. He was agitated the whole way to church. Sometimes he will calm down, sometimes we have to stop and hold him for a bit. I made it to church this night but he was still mad while we were there. After an hour I decide it is not worth it so we headed back home. I put Nicholas in his car seat and he immediately started crying, then arching to get out. I took him out and held him telling him we will be home in a few minutes. So I put him back in and he starts all over. Well, I head out anyway. We don't get far and I hear how agitated Nicholas is getting. I tell the kids that I am going to pull over and hold him for a bit. Now, this does not happen too much. To pull over at night with no husband with me is rare but something told me to pull over NOW. As I pull onto a side street I realize that I do not hear Nicholas anymore. Instead of saying "wow he is better," I know this is not the case. Something is terribly wrong.

I opened my car door which then turned on the interior lights and immediately heard Stephen D screaming. "Mommy, oh my God, Mommy hurry, help him." The next few minutes seemed like hours-agonizing painful hours. I got to Nicholas and barely glanced at him before I knew I had to take action. Nicholas was arched against his seat belt completely blue and not breathing. So many thoughts went through my head at that point.

"He is still conscious because he is arching."
"But..he is completely blue...my God he has got to be close to going into cardiac arrest."
"Dear God, please don't let him die. Not now. Not in front of all my kids. Please."
"Lisa, get him out NOW! If I get him out he will calm down and it will be fine. Nicholas always calms down when he is held."

I get him out of his seat which was really hard because he was so stiff. I held him against me knowing all will be okay. It's not. He still won't breathe. I rubbed his back, telling him it is okay but still no BREATH OF LIFE. Lord, why is this happening? Please don't take him. Don't do this to us..to my children..please. Breathe Nicholas.....breathe






In his hand is the life of every creature and the breath of all mankind. Job 12:10

I knew at this point I would have to do CPR on Nicholas. I had never done nor practiced it. Stephen had told me how to do it and I prayed really hard I would remember. Really, your mind does go blank yet a million thoughts run through your head. Your body goes on instinct. The Lord took over for me-thank goodness. As I was about to lower Nicholas to the ground and start CPR, I felt and heard it. The Breath of Life.

The Spirit of God has made me; the breath of the Almighty gives me life. Job 33:4

That huge deep intake of breath. I froze. Again, Nicholas took a deep breath then he relaxed and starting his normal breathing. Nicholas then started to cry and of course I lost it then. I got back in the car and we just cried and cried. Then I heard Brandon. Sweet Brandon. Again, he is there to see his brother. Oh no...what do I do. I need to take care of Nicholas but Brandon needs me too. He is screaming for Daddy. Screaming for Nicholas not to die. Then I heard Stephen. "Brandon, it's ok. Nicholas is ok. Hear him cry. He's ok buddy." I turn around and see that Stephen has his arm around Brandon and is trying to console him.

I fly home with Nicholas in my lap. Yes, I know how dangerous this is but there is no way I was putting him back in the car seat. Steve meets us at home where we go over everything that happened.

You know, I was there in the waiting room on May 4th 2007. Waiting to see if Nicholas would breath again. Not knowing if I would ever hold my baby again. I was told the story from Stephen about May 13th 2008 when he had to breathe the breath of life into Nicholas. No matter how that felt, how my heart broke those times, it will never compare to holding my child who is not breathing while my three other children cry watching it all. How precious is the breath of life. That gift the Lord gives to all of us to live.



I ask that you pray for my children especially Brandon. He has been through so much and is hurting from this. We are going to have Brandon see someone who specializes in families such as ours. Pray for him. I know there is a reason for this. It hurts as a mother to have my children go through this. On the other hand, the Lord knew this would happen and prepared all of us for this. Stephen has such a special heart for special needs children, Megan wants to be a PICU nurse, and Brandon wants to be a pediatric surgeon to "fix all of the children in the world."

Again, I thank the Lord for giving me Nicholas back. For blessing me with him and Stephen, Megan and Brandon. We are truly, truly blessed. In simple words....I feel so lucky!!

Birthday for Brandon and Nicholas

We combined the birthday parties for Nicholas and Brandon (2nd and 5th) Brandon decided Nicholas likes Star Wars therefore that should be the theme. Below are pictures......

Happy 5th Birthday Brandon!!!

Okay....I am soooo behind on blogging. Maybe I should stay off facebook for a while!!
So now we will play catch up and go back in time to October 3rd 2008-Brandon's 5th Birthday. We wanted to do something really special for him. He LOVES Thomas and knew he would be at the train station on his Birthday. So Stephen and I bought tickets and surprised Brandon with a trip to see Thomas. He was so excited. We had such a great time. Below are pictures of our day out with Thomas.





Happy Birthday Brandon-we love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Merry Christmas Mother

Christmas was mom's time of the year, her joyous season. I remember as a kid all the decorating and baking she did. Christmas music filled the house. Two years ago, after a race well run, my mother completed her ministry on earth and God was ready to call her home. On December 28, 2006, shortly after midnight, mom met Jesus! Merry Christmas mom...I miss you very much.

Your son, Stephen

I am thankful for.......

You know as parents we do the best we can to raise our children right. We pray with them and for them. We pray they accept Jesus into their hearts and lives. We pray for them as they go out into the world that they will stay strong in their faith and always make the right choices. We know they will make mistakes but we pray they learn and grow from them.

I remember when Stephen D was 5 and it was time to send him off to Kindergarten. I cried and cried!!! He was my baby and I had to let go of a part of him and send him off to school. A whole day without mommy by his side to protect him. Then when he cried I gathered him in my arms and started to head right back out of the dreadful school (which by the way was a great school) Then I stopped. Was this the way I was supposed to raise Stephen? Keep him at home, sheltered from the world. No...I was to raise him the best way I knew how, put him in the arms of the Lord and trust in Him to guide my son. So...I let go of him and let him make his way into his little world.

I also remember the day, of course, that he accepted Christ. It was our wedding anniversary and he spent the night with Nana and Papaw. He asked them that night to pray with him and my little boy accepted Christ with his Nana and Papaw. What a joyous day!!!

He is now ten years old. Always my little boy, my baby but now bigger. It is still hard sometimes to let go of him and send him to school. Will he make the right choices? Will he tell his friends about Jesus Christ or keep it to himself? He has learned a lot things that I would rather him not know from going to public school. Things I never learned until I was a teenager. But we should not keep Jesus to ourselves. We are to go and tell the world about His love and that is what my son does at school. My little missionary. There are so many kids in his school that do not know Christ and he makes sure he tells them. How proud we are of him!!!

He did a project in school about things he was thankful for and I have written it below-word for word.

The things I am thankful for....by Stephen Richardson

The things I am thankful for are my mom, dad, Jesus, Thomas, and my brother. My mom I am so thankful for because she takes me to Target when I need to spend some of my money. She makes me food. She gets PSP games for me. She is the best ever.
I am also thankful for my dad. He takes me to baseball games and he takes me fishing and also takes me to his office at the police department. It is cool having a dad like him.
The person I am most thankful for is Jesus because he loves me and he died on the cross for me and I will never forget that.
Thomas is one of my best friends ever. He is funny. He's a good hunter and fisher and I love being around him.
My brother Nicholas is the best brother I have ever had. He is a special needs baby but I still love him no matter what.

From the words of a ten year old boy. Stephen, we love you so much. You make us so proud. We will forever pray for you as you grow and learn in your faith. We pray for His guidance and arms of protection around you as you teach others through your thoughtfulness and sincerity about the love of Jesus Christ. Thank you for teaching mommy and daddy about His love.

He's My Son

I changed the song recently so that when you open our blog it plays He's my son by Mark Schultz. As your reading this, you are hearing it. Please put your speakers on if you don't. Listen to the words-that is how I feel about my son. It reminds me of the time he was on life support and we did not know if he would live and if he did what state he would be in. I remember begging the Lord in prayer not to take my son. Today, I watch him sleep praying for him. Praying the Lord will not let him be scared anymore, not hurt, let him grow old. I pray for the Lord's strength every day for my son cherishing every miunte I have with him. I find myself taking pictures of him sleeping. He is so precious and peaceful when he sleeps. Below are the words to the song. Below that are pictures of Nicholas from the time he was born until today. His life story in pictures.




I'm down on my knees again tonight
I'm hoping this prayer will turn out right
See there is a boy that needs Your help
I've done all that I can do myself
His mother is tired
I'm sure You can understand
Each night as he sleeps
She goes in to hold his hand
And she tries not to cry
As the tears fill her eyes
CHORUS:
Can You hear me?
Am I getting through tonight?
Can You see him?
Can You make him feel all right?
If You can hear me Let me take his place somehow
See, he's not just anyone He's my son
Sometimes late at night I watch him sleep
I dream of the boy he'd like to be
I try to be strong and see him through
But God who he needs right now is You
Let him grow old
Live life without this fear
What would I be
Living without him here
He's so tired and he's scared
Let him know that You're there
CHORUSCan You hear me?
Can You see him?
Please don't leave him He's my son (He's My Son by Mark Schultz)

Born in at 4.7 lbs.....

Couple of days before surgery. The day after he got home from Brenner.

Please pray with us for Nicholas that the Lord will continue to heal him and give him strength.

Heart Walk

We walked in the Heart walk on the 18th in honor of Nicholas and in memory of all of the angel heart children. We had a great time. It was really fun to get all of the children involved with the walk (even though Megan and Brandon kept complaining about how tired they were ). We were also able to see Nicholas' heart surgeon and several of his former nurses. It was great to see them and catch up. Anyway, pictures are below. Thanks so much to all who supported us!!! Blessings- The Richardsons
This picture says it all!!! Brandon's personality comes out even in pictures-and that is his serious face.

Stephen talking to Mike (Dr. Hines) the man who saved Nicholas' life and fixed his heart. At one point, someone came up to Stephen and Mike and asked them to get CPR ceritified. Poor person didn't realize they were speaking to a heart surgeon and police officer. Do you think Stephen graciously let that poor person off the hook?
On the way home.......................aren't they sweet?

A Party for Christ

On October 4th we attended the first annual Party For Christ featuring Direct Message. Direct Message is a local southern rock Christian Band. We first met them when some good friends of ours held a benefit for Nicholas to help us pay for all of the medical bills. Direct Message offered to play for free at his benefit. Since then Stephen has become good friends with Randy Austin, one of the members. Randy wrote a song about Stephen and his life as a police officer and father of four children-one with special needs. They sang this song for us at the party for the first time together. The band members continue to pray for Nicholas and mean so much to us. Their website is http://www.directmessage.org/. Please take a visit!!
Stephen listening to his song written and sung by Randy. That's Randy singing the song-huge thanks Randy!! Your friendship and support means so much!