Nicholas James (1:17): To my sweet Nicholas

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

To my sweet Nicholas

My sweet Nicholas-I love you. You bring so much joy into my life. I still cannot believe that the Lord honored me by allowing me to be your mother. I am truly blessed to have you as my son. The son I was so scared to have and now am so scared to lose. Right now you are doing better and I am so thankful for that but I am still scared Nicholas. I look into your sweet face and I remember what happened two years ago in this very place. I remember the feeling of almost losing you. I don't want to lose you Nicholas. You're my son and I want to experience life with you. Be strong little one. I long to hold you in my arms and make it all better but I cannot. We must trust in the Lord and His strength to get you through this. Fight my little pickles. Get well so we can bring you home. I love you, mommy.

Dear Lord, I ask that you heal my son, my little pickles. Please give him the strength to beat this infection. We love him so much and are so thankful you brought him into our lives. You are the Master Healer and we put all of our faith and trust in you Lord. We know you hold him in your arms. We know you love him more than we could possibly imagine. Please heal my baby so we can bring him home and live life with him. In your precious name, Amen.

6 comments:

Tina Herndon said...: Lisa,

I so long to be the sweet mommy you are. Thank you for your inspiration. The picture of Nicholas holding your hand is priceless. I have had my good cry for the day now! :-) We are praying for each one of you. I love you, my friend. Stay strong.; April 7, 2009 at 4:42 PM
Anonymous said...: Lisa,

Our prayers are with you, Steve, your sweet children and especially for Nicholas. God's grace radiants from you through your words. Your letter to your son was beautiful. As we look this week at our Father's heart and what He knew was coming for His Son, I know He understands your needs better than anyone. I pray for peace beyond understanding for you and of course healing for Nicholas.; April 7, 2009 at 4:56 PM
Jill Gumbs said...: Lisa,

I am praying for you and your family!; April 7, 2009 at 6:58 PM
Unknown said...: Lisa,
Please know that you and your precious family are in our hearts and our prayers always. We love you. Dean and Misty Osborne; April 7, 2009 at 11:31 PM
Lara G Williams said...: Lisa,
Wow. I cannot imagine your road right now. But I will pray believing God's promises that He gives grace and strength when we are at our absolute weakest. You, Nicholas, and the rest of your sweet family are precious in His sight. In spite of your feelings I pray you will stand on His truth.
With love, Lara; April 8, 2009 at 6:13 AM
Wendy said...: Lisa, you are the strongest Mommy I know! I pray for your strength, your body and your rest...stay strong. I know God is sitting right beside you, he is keeping you going. Nicholas is one tough little guy! We are praying for you, Stephen, the kids and healing for Nicholas. Love you all!!; April 8, 2009 at 3:48 PM

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The Broken Gift

In August of 2008, I felt led to begin writing a book about our journey with Nicholas. The purpose of the book was to be twofold: First, I felt a strong sense to intimately share with others our journey of faith. It was my desire that people who were facing tremendous “life storms” as I call them, to see that God is faithful in all circumstances. Secondly, and much more selfishly, I wanted to present Lisa with the ultimate gift, a book about her son.

I began praying that God would open the doors if that were to be His will. I shared this with only one person, Chris Lewis, and asked him to be in prayer with me. Before I gave God the chance to answer me, I had already begun writing. Five months later, I had written six full chapters. During the process, I would occasionally email Chris a copy for his input. Unfortunately, he was a bit too encouraging, and the process continued.

Chapters six and seven began to slow me down. I was beginning to feel that my writing had become more about me than anything else. Additionally, I was becoming concerned that the book was taking on the form of a journal. I knew from research that journal style books were not welcome in the tough world of book publishing.

Chris had a friend in publishing who agreed to read my manuscript and give me advice. His advice stopped me cold in my tracks. It was just as I had suspected, the manuscript was too much of a journal. Strangely though, I was relieved. I had become increasingly frustrated during my writing sessions and now I could just stop. No more writing.

A short time later, I decided that I would share with Lisa the fruits of my secret, double life as an author. I printed the manuscript off in its entirety and gave it to her to read. I had dreamed of presenting her with a paperback book with a picture of her son on it, but this would have to do.

Fast forward to today. The original intent of the book has not changed. I want people to see Jesus when they see our family. I want people to know there is hope. I want people to understand that God is bigger than our circumstances and brings us through them for a reason.

With that in mind, I decided that Nicholas’ blogsite is a great way to still get my “journal” out there, into the hands of people who may be touched by our story. Each week I will add a new chapter.

To read The Broken Gift, click on the chapters below.

Chapter 1 Code Blue
Chapter 2 Back to the Beginning
Chapter 3 New Relationships
Chapter 4 The Arrival
Chapter 5 Life Goes On
Chapter 6 Surgery